Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The ham sandwich...oy!

The holidays are all over and it's time for things to get back to normal. A and I resumed our regular schedule today and hubby went on to work. I've got to admit, the house seems quiet without him and I definitely miss having him here. But....a teeny part of me is glad he's back at work. 

It seems like whenever hubby is off work for extended periods of time, we bicker more. This makes sense since we normally see each other for about an hour in the morning and about 3-4 hours every evening. When he is on vacation, we are together about 12-15 hours straight! Also, A and I have a pretty structured and balanced schedule normally, but on vacations, that all goes out the window. 

The other problem with hubby being home is my mindset. I tend to think, "Yay, he is home from work! I will have a lot more help around the house and with A!". Of course, hubby is thinking, "Yay! I'm off of work! Time to get projects around the house done and then relax!".  Whoops! To give my husband credit ( where credit is due) he always is a HUGE help with our son, even when he does go to work. He pretty much does bath time and PJ time every night, helps do dishes, and picks up toys. Did I mention he makes the bed each morning before work too? 

Of course, a huge reason my husband is such a helpful man is because of his parents. Now, I promise I'm not just saying this because I know my mother-in-law reads my blog. I am fortunate to have married a man whose mother taught him how to do laundry and clean. GASP! These men do exist! The problem is, now that I am a stay at home mom, there aren't many opportunities for him to show this side of himself. The other problem is, he LOVES to use this cleaning knowledge to criticize me.

 Yes- me, the person actually doing the cleaning and laundry now. OY! 

I remember an incident that happened when we first started dating. I was only 22 years old and living in my first apartment. While I was a pretty tidy person, I wasn't really into cleaning and scrubbing things yet. (Is anyone really into that?) We had been seeing each other for a few months and were just starting to get serious. I had been waiting for him to say the "L" word. One day, during one of his visits to my place, he sat me down on the bed and told me he needed to talk to me about something. I thought, "This is it! He's going to tell me he loves me!!!!". Instead, he pointed to the fan in my bedroom. He said, "You see that fan? Look how dusty the blades are. It's disgusting. You really should clean that!" 

Folks, this is a true story. You can't make this shit up. 

Which brings me to yesterday's incident with the ham sandwich.

 A was down for his afternoon nap and I was prepared to tackle my daily to do list. Meanwhile, hubby screwed around on the computer and started making his lunch. First thing on the list, vacuum. I like to get that one done first before A falls asleep. As I pulled out the Dyson, hubby had the nerve to sit himself down on the recliner with a HAM SANDWICH! In the only room I needed to vacuum! I guess he was waiting for me to finish so he could watch TV or something.

 Anyway, I had just started to vacuum the living room when I saw him motioning to me and heard him scream, "Turn it off! Turn it off!" 

Okaaaaay....Once it was off, he informed me that it was making a weird noise and the way to remedy that was to turn it off and turn it back on.


 I started up again only to hear him yelling at me to stop again! This time, I pretended not to hear him and turned around so I couldn't see him either. He continued yelling until I could ignore him no longer. "WHAT NOW?!" I screamed. He told me that it sounded like the filter needed to be emptied. Keep in mind people, I had been vacuuming less than 3 minutes.

 "Are you seriously sitting in the recliner, eating a ham sandwich, and instructing me on how to vacuum?!?!?!" I exploded. That made him laugh hysterically and say, "Hmm, I guess I am."

With that, I gladly handed over the vacuum. After all, he is the cleaning expert, isn't he? 

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