Do any of you mom readers also suffer from the condition 'sappy mom syndrome'? Before I was a mom, I was pretty sensitive and sappy but this is just ridiculous! It seems like I can no longer get through my daily activities without at least once tearing up over the craziest things.
Once I became a mother, I started seeing the world in a whole new way. I remember all those people trying to talk to me about this when I was pregnant. "You have no idea what the love of your child will feel like," they'd say. "It's indescribable! You'll see when the baby is here!"
"Yeah, yeah." I'd say to myself while smiling and nodding. I knew what it was like to love parents, siblings, friends, my husband, and even my students, so loving my child couldn't feel much different, could it?
When we first brought A home from the hospital, I cried the ENTIRE ride. It was a 45 minute drive too. We have the video footage to prove it. There I am, dropping the baby carrier on the couch, weeping, and running away from the camera so my sobs wouldn't be captured on video. At that point, it was less about the intense love for my child and more about, "Holy shit! I can't believe they let me take this baby out of the hospital. Don't they know I have no clue what I am doing??"
The truth is, when A was first born, I did feel that love, but not as intensely as I do now. I believe it's because I didn't really know him yet. He was a cute, sweet little baby boy, but also at that age, a blob. All he did was eat, sleep, and poop. Of course, I vividly remember my husband and I taking turns holding him, looking at each other and saying, "I love him! I just love him!" several times a day. At his first mommy and me class (he was 7 weeks old), I couldn't even finish singing the song, "You are my sunshine" with the group because I knew I'd lose it if I opened my mouth. I also remember tearing up at his first smile, his bris, first shots at the doctor, and every single milestone. What a sap, right?
Now that A is close to three years old, I'm not any better. In fact, I'd say I'm WORSE! Because now I know him, like really know him. I know the kind of sweet, gentle, loving, funny, wacky kid he is and I love love love him for it. Oh yes, my SMS has taken a turn for the worse. Little things set me off now. Like last night, when A grabbed hubby and me and forced us into a game of ring around the rosie. I had a pile of dishes to wash but I figured it would only take a minute so I'd humor him. The second or third time around the rosie, I suddenly felt myself tearing up. Oh no! I didn't want hubby to see because he does NOT suffer from SMS and would think I was a weirdo. I just couldn't help it. The moment was so sweet and I thought, "This is what life is about. The three of us laughing and dancing in the living room together. Everyone should be this lucky." Oh crap, I'm tearing up writing this. SMS.
Anyone else cry hysterically at the movie Dumbo? It's my son's favorite movie and I cry each time he watches it. The part where Dumbo goes to see his imprisoned mom and she rocks him with her trunk and the song, "Baby Mine" comes on. Gets me every single time. SMS.
Or how about the book, I'll Love You Forever. Oh. My. God. In almost three years, I have yet to read that book without crying. The part at the end where the boy/man stands on the stairs for a long time (after rocking and singing to his sick mother) and then goes and rocks his new baby girl.....always a tearjerker! SMS.
This past weekend was a little emotional for me because we transitioned A from his crib into his toddler bed. I was nervous but also excited for A to make this big step. Imagine my delight when the very first naptime, he begged to go in his bed and slept soundly in it for two hours! But the sight of that little body sleeping in that bed and that little head on that pillow brought tears (of joy, pride, and a little nostalgia) to my eyes. Because my little boy is growing up and that was another visual reminder. Of course, I'm not sad he's growing up, but you know what I mean. SMS.
To be honest, I don't think I really mind "suffering" from Sappy Mom Syndrome. I think it's just part of being a proud, loving mom. I'm sure there are many more SMS moments to come. Guess I better start buying stock in Kleenex.